GARDENING AT CHRISTMAS - There are those that wish to combine the celebrations of Christmas with useful gardening – so here is a list that combines both.- Open bottle of Champagne, drink a glass. Thus refreshed, pop outside and prune that conifer back a bit.
- Have a second glass - that was hard work - you deserve it.
- Outside again and do a bit of weeding - throw the weeds over the fence to next door - they’ll never notice.
- Have another glass!
- Time to move that ... shrubby thing - you know ... that green thing ... dig it up and move it over there … by the glassy thing ... greenhouse - that’s it!
- Have another ... oh it’s finished - best open abuther nottle ... erm … another bottle.
- Now, those pigeons on the fence … if I can just – yes, got one ... perfect shot - knew that empty bottle would come in useful.
- Pay for next door neighbours gazebo repairs in the New Year.
- Slump in armchair happy in the knowledge of a job done well.
- And another thing ... wotsit ... waserr ... oh yes ... Chrissy Merrymas! ...hic....
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